I cannot comment

This is a comment I cut and pasted from one of my bestest most loved blogger friends. One of all of them that I haven't met. Ever. Ever. Ever.

I have taken the liberty of swiping it from whence it came to prove a scary point. As much as this post makes no sense. Zilch. It does in the same right. Because somehow, in this strange, indefinable void that is blogland - it makes perfect sense.

Now, without further ado....

"Yes, yes. A bahookie, could DEFINITELY be something with wind - either from your ass or from something else.I am feelin' it fo' sho'.Also, I am drunk.But what the hell does THAT matter? Really. Aren't I always drunk?So full o' glee that you have a lady friend worth being gleeful over.Like that word right now - gleeful.Gonna take it and run with it.With glee.Also - just so you know - I am not this witty in person.Actually , I am a mute. Really. Mean it.With glee.Ok. I'll shut up. "

If you are still reading this. You get it. You fucking freak.

Love you. Mean it.

Wanting a "re-do"

I had a dream last night.

I dreamt that I was alone in a bedroom with Matthew McConaughey and he wanted to have sex with me REALLY bad. Not in a slimy way - but in a "damn, you are amazing" kinda way.

I told him I was attracted to his spirit, but not him and that we could only be friends.

He was ok with it. He hugged me and we had a cup of coffee and talked.

It was a dream about how I was mentally retarded.

Shit I Be Doin'

Hot Damn! I iz one bizzle mcnizzle bee. Haven't had the time tuh catch my breath in a handful of weeks.

So lesee...

What have I been up to these dayz........

Welp - there was the episode where I was hanging out at the pediatric ICU with one of my best friends as we watched her 4 month old get all tied up in wires and monitors. That was fun. Really. It was a fun week. Even I was crying over this baby. I almost went to blows with a nurse who wasn't "tender" enough towards the wee one. I was like Denzel Washington in Man on Fire. 'Cept I didn't kill anyone nor did I sacrifice my life for this baby's. But I might have. Got me all emotional for once over a babe. I was a live wire, lemme tell you.

I guess it's more that I am violently protective of my friend. People try to steam roll her. Pisses me off.

Hmm.

What else.

Oh - how about we decided to go back to Europe? Yeah. I stood up my platonic boyfriend Badgerdaddy. As me and my boy from the States tried to find a way to get up to Vegas to visit him on his brief and blissful trip to Sin City we realized: Fuck it. Weez just gunna go back to London by way of Italy, Spain and sum other place we pick. Ok. We luv the UK so much we just may hang there. But we may possibly hit Paris for a couple o-days. Who knows.

I {heart} Badgerdaddy. Even if a chic who will remain nameless here does not seem to want to keep in touch with him. I swear - I would TOTALLY cat fight for you baby. Totally.

What else.

Going through another Elvis Costello phase. Please help. I believe an intervention is order.

VERONICA... VERONICA.. VERONICAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Also. I think we will be doing New York for Christmas this year. Not sure if we will. If you are around - give me shout out. Love drinking with my life long perfect stranger/blog friends.

Additionally, work has taken a turn for the exceptionally well. Holy shit, been really up to my eye balls in clients. Everybody wants a piece of me. Been quite nice. To quote to nobel peace prize winner/teeniebop surfer/flying nun Sally Field : "You like me! You really like me!" Wowzers.

Lastly. I finished a whole bottle of vodka myself in 3 days. Those were all week days by the way. I can stop whenever I want.

Nuthin like being a drunk to close this out and give me quite the sense of accomplishment.

Oh - one more thing. I crave fried chicken.

Ok. Now I am done.

6 years of wedded bliss.

King of Annaland "Quit fucking yelling! I am almost ready to go."

Anna "I am not yelling damn it. I am just talking to you in a LOUD voice because I love you, fucktard!"

King of Annaland "Why is it that when you say things like that, it's actually funny and not offensive?"

Anna "Because I am better than you."

King of Annaland "Hmm. Not possible. I have a dong. You just sport a bearded clam."

Anna "Happy anniversary baby."

King of Annaland "Right back at you, bearded one.

Anna "Again I say, fucktard."